’Once you got to know him, you just loved him’

Friends, family remember Toby Wilt

Toby Wilt participates in his immersive learning project for his senior capstone course. According to friends, Wilt, an information systems and operations management major, was a daredevil and prankster. PHOTO PROVIDED BY FRED KITCHENS III
Toby Wilt participates in his immersive learning project for his senior capstone course. According to friends, Wilt, an information systems and operations management major, was a daredevil and prankster. PHOTO PROVIDED BY FRED KITCHENS III

When friends and family met Saturday to commemorate the life of Ball State student Toby Wilt, they did it how he would have preferred: privately.

To his classmates, the 23-year-old fifth year senior was a quiet, reserved guy with a full beard and sweatpants, who only showed up to classes if there was an attendance policy.

To his closest friends, he was a daredevil and prankster who would debate for hours and skip anything to make sure he saw the Patriots game. It took time to get to know Wilt, his friends said, but once he opened up, he was a loyal friend.

“Once you got to know him, you just loved him,” said Matt Short, one of Wilt’s best friends.

Wilt, a senior information systems and operations management major,  died April 13 at his off-campus house.

His father, Douglas Wilt, said it was an accidental death, and the autopsy results have not been released yet.

“We are a mess,” he said. “He was my son. I loved him. He was a great kid. He was very likable — had a lot of close friends.”

BEHIND THE BEARD

Toby Wilt came to Ball State from Randolph Southern High School in Lynn, Ind., with a few close friends and the beginnings of a beard.

“Everyone loved his beard,” said Meghan Wolfe, a junior anthropology major and one of Toby’s best friends. “Men would just be like, ‘Hey man, I like your beard.’”

Matt Short, also a senior information systems and operations management major, said he had been working on it for about three years.

“He was one of those guys that didn’t care what other people thought about him, he would be himself no matter what,” he said.

Fred Kitchens, an associate professor of information systems, had told Wilt he needed to trim his facial hair before looking for a job, since he had interviews lined up.

“He was really preparing for the next step after college,” Kitchens said. “I told him to trim the beard, then after you get the job, grow it out as long as you want.”

So the beard was trimmed.

This year, Wilt had been working on a capstone project for Kitchens’ class before graduating, making a mobile app and redesigning communication baselines for Republic Airlines in Indianapolis. His group finished the project March 31.

His father said Kitchens was one of Wilt’s favorite professors.

Kitchens said he and Wilt connected since they were both introverted. He said he understood how he worked, and knew that when Wilt was being quiet, it was because he was listening and being respectful. He said Wilt probably listened harder than anyone else, using the quiet to make connections and come up with solutions.

Kitchens said he is hoping to get Wilt’s diploma for his family, but it is out of his hands now.

TOUGH TYPE OF GUY

Matt Short first met Wilt in elementary school. He said Wilt always had a prank up his sleeve and was always doing something daring.

“He’d be jumping off 12 foot swings and slides,” Short said. “One of my friends had a balcony in their house, and he’d jump off of it. He actually never [got hurt], surprisingly. He had some bruises, and I know he sprained his ankle pretty bad one time, but never broke anything.”

Once, when he was young, Short said Wilt had broken his arm nearly in an S-shape, but didn’t cry.

He said that’s the kind of guy Wilt was.

For four years, Wilt played flag football at Ball State, and he hated to lose. Short said he was the first guy to call a practice and would stay out longer than any of his teammates wanted.

He was the same way playing competitive “Halo 3.”

“He was the best ‘Halo’ player I’ve ever played with,” Short said. “... He could dominate me.”

At Ball State, the two became roommates. Short said it was easy to get along with Wilt. The friends would debate everything from movies to sports for hours.

The Patriots were Wilt’s favorite team, and Short said he hadn’t missed a game in probably eight years.

“He would skip everything for a Patriots game — make up lies,” he said. “Tell his group he had to go home just to stay home and watch the Patriots game. He did that a few times this year.”

Short said Wilt did skip most of his classes when there wasn’t an attendance policy.

“He was smart enough to get by that way,” Short said.

Meghan Wolfe met Wilt later. He would help her with her school work and watched anime with her. She said they went on a lot of bike rides on the Cardinal Greenway together.

“I think we kind of stuck together because we helped each other,” Wolfe said.

The close friends said they will get together to tell stories and help each other remember.

“It’s hard to accept,” Wolfe said. “... You really can’t sum up your best friend in a 10-minute discussion. It’s impossible.”

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