This past Sunday, Michael Memea made a dream come true. With one echoing chink of his aluminum bat, he won the Little League World Series for Hawaii. Memea’s teammates stormed the field, taking the traditional victory lap only after shaking the hands of the losing team.Baseball doesn’t get any more exciting than a walk-off home run in the bottom of an extra inning with a full count. The best part? The only “juice” that these kids are on is apple.Steroids are ruining major league baseball. The Week magazine reports that the average major league player is 20 pounds heavier than the average player was just 30 years ago. Was it really a surprise to see Roger Maris’ 38-year-old home run record obliterated by Mark McGwire, only to have the new record broken just three seasons later by Barry Bonds? The use of performance-enhancing drugs is a particularly deleterious form of cheating. And cheaters suck.House Government Reform Committee Chairman Tom Davis, R-Va., opened the hearings by quipping that: “We’re in the first inning of what could be an extra-inning ball game.” (Shouldn’t Bill Clinton run these hearings? The perfect hybrid of political charisma and baseball expertise — he’s a former president who has no trouble getting to third base.) Jose Canseco testified that “steroid use is unnecessary to be a great athlete.” Then, he turned bright green and shredded his suit with his bare hands. True, there has always been cheating in baseball. Eight Chicago White Sox players were accused of throwing the 1919 World Series. Pitchers hide nail files in their gloves to whittle sharp-breaking scuffballs. Sammy Sosa could host an episode “Martha Stewart Living” on his creative uses of cork. Even the 2001 Little League World Series was marred by the Danny Almonte scandal, when it was revealed the star player was two years older than the age limit for the tournament — but the steroid problem is literally bigger than all of these. Performance-enhancing drugs are poison.Scientists at Southern Cross University in Australia discovered steroids might significantly increase susceptibility to viral infections and cancers. Steroid users may suffer from violent outbursts, liver abnormalities and psychiatric disorders. Harvard psychiatrist Harrison Pope warns that suicide attempts due to steroid withdrawal are “more common than most people suspect.”The Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research reports that men who take anabolic steroids may develop infertility and shrunken testicles. Is it any wonder Rafael Palmeiro was a spokesperson for a major erectile dysfunction pill? The Mayo Foundation also reports that steroid abuse leads to the development of “prominent breasts” in men. The last thing the world needs is a Victoria’s Secret spread featuring Jason Giambi; talk about putting the andro in androgynous.But there was nothing ambiguous about Sunday’s little league triumph. It was pure, and it was brilliant. How did it feel to hit the game-winner? “I was excited. I knew it was gone when it left the bat,” Memea answered shyly, wearing a candy necklace. BALCO Laboratories, sensing an untapped market, immediately began developing anabolic Smarties.I’m tired of watching America’s game devolve into America’s shame. The Little League World Series has it right: teamwork, good sportsmanship, a passion for the game and uninhibited joy. Professional baseball has lost sight of these values and is instead becoming a septic tank of hyped-up phonies who would rather receive an injection than take an extra hour of batting practice. I want major league baseball to be fun again. The thousands of empty seats at ballparks across the country prove that I’m not alone.
Write to Brian at
bggorrell@bsu.edu
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