Kids today. Can't live with them, can't bring yourself to take away their American Express cards.
Those of you born circa 1983, take my hand as we drift through the sands of time to the year 1988. Those were the days of S'mores Crunch cereal and "DuckTales" and, hoping to achieve coolness, tracing stencils directly onto our pants three minutes before we were due to walk out the door for preschool. Back then, life was great.
However, there were some drawbacks.
For example, today when you walk into a typical grocery store, you will see carts with plastic attachments, complete with steering wheels, which make them look like race cars. In 1988, we had no such embellishments. In fact, we had nothing that would give any pretense that we were in control of the cart. We were to sit inside the cart quietly or we would be spanked in the middle of the store. The other parents, when observing the spectacle, would turn to their children and say, "That will be YOU if you don't sit your BUTT down RIGHT now."
Today if you are a child misbehaving in a store, your parent will likely say, "Now, Jenypher, sit down or we won't go to Gap Kids on the way home." Or, if your parent does give you a well-deserved smack on the tush, the other parents will glare at him or her, call child services, and then he or she will be arrested. B.F. Skinner would be proud.
So, to avoid the whole scene, kids today simply get to sit in the race car portion of the cart. Which is fine. I do not mind if society caters to children as long as they are not in the middle of the aisle throwing violent temper tantrums and obstructing the path to the kettle corn. What is not fine is that there are more and more elements of childhood that are likely to induce temper tantrums rather than suppress them, by which I mean child-play areas in public places.
As a child, I remember frequently visiting the Grand Rapids International Airport. Despite the fact that Grand Rapids is the second largest city in Michigan, the Grand Rapids International Airport was about the size of a standard convenience store restroom. In the way of entertainment, there was an arcade and a fountain where my Granny probably lost hundreds of dollars in pennies.
Since then, the airport has been renovated. The fountain is gone, the arcade grew exponentially, and there is an entire room designated as a play area.
Do me a favor. Ask a child what he or she would rather do: play in a fountain and spend hours and hours exercising the imagination or sit in a room pushing wooden beads along the paths of twisting, plastic-coated wires. Likely, the child will choose "none of the above" because he or she would rather watch Baby Mozart, which I believe to be the leading cause of ADD in America.
Obviously this is a sensitive topic for me. But don't worry. I'll be fine with patience, a little coaxing and a nice trip to Gap Kids on the way home.
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