As students go about their happy hauntings this Halloweenweekend, I would like to send out a warning.
Whether you choose trick or treat, remember that indulging intoo much of either can have grave consequences.
Obviously, too many treats can lead to sickness, irrationalbehavior or random phone calls to third-grade field-tripbuddies.
Tricks and pranks are another Halloween tradition. When wellorchestrated, the prank can offer memories, laughter and keep one'srecord clean.
But it can also backfire.
Trust me, I know this. I have a friend named Kyle — theking of pranks.
Once, my friends lifted a lawn jockey from a house in myneighborhood. They dragged it by an SUV, set it on fire and smashedit with sledgehammers. They videotaped their destruction. Whenpeople watch the video, they laugh so hard they are still driven totears.
The owners replaced the lawn jockey, and my friends were neverlinked to its disappearance.
Not every prank, however, turns out that well. I call thisexample "The Legend of Shed Roof Hollow."
I had my first Fourth of July cookout two years ago. Kyle cameequipped with a cooler and a quarter stick of dynamite. My parentswere celebrating with family, and I was responsible for the wellbeing of my guests and the house.
"Phillips," he said, holding the dynamite, "do you have anythingwe could blow up with this?"
Logic should have kicked in and reminded me that this is thesame person who stole a potted plant and left it on my lawn thenight he asked me to prom because he forgot to buy roses.
But logic doesn't always work.
I left the grilling to others and opened the shed to find an oldtoy. We came across a plastic Pillsbury Doughboy. Kyle chose thisas his subject, and I agreed to sacrifice it for the good of theparty. I gave him one restriction: Do not put it anywhere wheresomeone could be harmed.
The next thing I knew, a wick stuck menacingly from theDoughboy's neck. He had a defeated look on his face as he Kylepropped him on the edge of my father's shed roof.
"Kyle, take that off the shed," I yelled as I lit some tikitorches.
Kyle, however, had already lit the wick. Before I could think ofa safer alternative, the dynamite went off. Everyone hit theground. Neighbors came forward with shrouds of the Doughboy.
When the smoke cleared, I inspected the shed.
There was a hole through the roof. Then my genius friendsdecided to take shingles from another part of the roof to cover thehole. They did their best to convince me that no one would everknow.
Within a week, my father confronted me about the shed, and Iconfessed. He was frustrated because he had two areas of the roofto patch because of my friends' bright idea.
I hope you can learn from this experience. A fun trick might notland you in the state penitentiary, but it can give you a labellike "Shed boy," which is how my father refers to Kyle.
Halloween fun is part of life, but be cautious, whether youindulge in too much candy, witch's brew or play too manytricks.
And if your friend has a quarter stick of dynamite, keep himaway from your shed.
Write to Lauren at lmphillips@bsu.edu
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