Since we made our debut in the Daily News, we've decided that we haven't included enough of our opinions (this is an opinion column, for those of you thinking we are Dan Rather and Tom Brokaw - only better looking). Anywho, like it or hate it, here is our view of what is currently sweet (good), sour (bad) and tasteless (ugly). Our views do necessarily represent... our views.
Sweet: The BSU's Men's Volleyball team is ranked 7th in the nation.
Sour: Even with their high ranking, they still don't get the respect they earned and deserve.
Sweet: Finally a competitive election for SGA. In fact, both candidates presented their platforms last Thursday at Spectrum.
Sour: Both candidates use the word "change" in their campaign slogans, which can be confusing to voters.
Sweet: The belief of Kevin being gay.
Sour: The belief of Mat being gay.
Sweet: Computers are available on campus for all people.
Sour: The people who use them for their anonymous sexual rendezvous planning. Even after he was exposed to the campus in our second column, he is still using the labs (and also various restroom facilities) today.
Sweet: Not everybody is ignorant enough to waste, on average, $60 a phone call on Ms. Cleo.
Sour: 6 million people are ignorant enough to waste $60 a phone call on Ms. Cleo. Tasteless: The annoying commercials, emails and telemarketing calls that claim Ms. Cleo has something earth shattering to tell us.
Sweet: Spectrum will be hosting a drag show Saturday, April 20 at the Atrium at 7:30.
Sour: Girls will leave early after they see drag queens do a better job on their eye liner.
Sweet: The Canadian ice skaters finally got what they deserved; an Olympic gold medal.
Sour: French judge who almost tarnished the image of the Olympics. Tasteless: Shaving your French poodle.
Sweet: People writing "Letters to the Editor" expressing their opinions about our column which encouraged BSU to come up with better derogatory terms for straights beside "breeder."
Sour: Some people not fully understanding the concept of the "breeder" column. Tasteless: Writing us with an account that had "smearthequeer" as their email address and not signing their real name.
Sweet: After Mat waited his whole life, the Patriots finally won a Super Bowl. The AFC also won the Pro Bowl.
Sour: Having to wait half a year without football.
Sweet: Colon Powell answers a question about the condom usage of America's teenagers in preventing diseases and unwanted pregnancies - like any rational human being would.
Sour: People thinking an abstinence based sex education class would do more good to hormone-crazy high school students than teaching them how to use condoms. Tasteless: Parents not talking to their kids about sex.
Sweet: Ball State celebrates "Focus on Asia Week."
Sour: Students think eating at Asian Creations (or the Red Sun, which is the best Chinese buffet ever) counts as a cultural event. Tasteless: Asian Creations fried rice.
Sweet: Kevin has a gay room mate.
Sour: Everyone assumes Kevin and his room mate are dating - which they are not. Tasteless: Both are single.
Sweet: Muncie considers separating the smoking and non-smoking sections of restaurants.
Sour: No longer will second-hand smoke be offered as a side dish. Tasteless: Tabacco.
Sweet: The Simpson's, The Family Guy and Futurama are knee-slappingly hilarious.
Sour: Thanks to horrible time slots by Fox, The Family Guy and Futurama are getting the boot. Tasteless: Everything else Fox puts on the air.
Sweet: Ball State sells bananas.
Sour: You can go to Marsh and buy a pound of bananas for the same price. Tasteless: Bruised fruit.
There you have it. You've seen the sweet, the sour and the tasteless. Hopefully a fifth grader couldn't have done better (definitely a sour comment about our column).
Write to Kevin and Mat at Twobsuguys@yahoo.com
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