In "Mo' Better Blues," Cynda Williams sang the pants off of Denzel Washington. She has twice played Halle Berry's older sister in the movies "The Wedding" and "Introducing Dorothy Dandridge." She then got "Caught Up" with Bokeem Woodbine as his thieving, psychic companion.
Invited to Ball State University as a professional guest artist for "Twilight: Los Angeles, 1992;" the creamy-caramel skinned actress with short, curly hair reflected on her experience as a leading lady of film, television and stage. But the most important experience she shared was the pain it took to make the gains as a star of the silver screen.
Mo' Better "Blues""It ain't no joke out there," - Williams
Following her college graduation from Ball State in 1988, the then 22-year-old hopeful set sail for Manhattan to try finding work. Diverted to Connecticut at first, Williams had to work two full-time jobs to make ends meet. Soon after, she and a roommate found a place in New York City and Williams was cast in an off-Broadway musical titled "Two by Two," a play about Noah's Ark with music by Richard Rogers.
"It was exactly how it sounded," she said. "It was cute."
Later that year she got her big break as aspiring jazz singer Clarke Betancourt in "Mo' Better Blues." And Williams got the "blues" when she found out what the professional world of acting was really like. After Spike Lee gave her the call to come back to the studio to tell her she got the leading role, she was greeted at the studio door by Denzel Washington, who told her he had good news and bad news. The good news was she got the part, and the bad news was her feet were too big, even though she wears a size six.
Williams also had to endure mistreatment from several people working on the project.
She was sexually harassed by some of the bigger-named people throughout the filming.
"They just want some pretty young thing that they can get some booty from," she said. "Pretty: definitely; young: yes; a thing from whom they can get some booty: hell no," she said.
But she held on to the values of her Christian upbringing and did not "put out," which was part of the cause of her conflicts.
She explained the majority of casting really does happen on the casting couch (meaning having sex with people who head the projects).
"I was scarred by the experience," she said. "It was traumatizing."
She also said she was forced to grow up quickly and become more astute about the business. She was paid the least amount a leading actress could have been paid at the time, which was $1,400 a week, and a couple hundred dollars for the song she recorded on the soundtrack, titled "Harlem Blues," despite the fact it reached the top of the R&B charts.
Billy Bob Thornton"I want to die," - Williams
One person who helped her transition from a virginal, na've girl to an assertive, thick-skinned woman was her ex-husband, actor Billy Bob Thornton. Yes, the same Billy Bob who married Angelina Jolie before she was half of "Brangelina."
Williams said she was sexually abused as a child and had very little positive romantic experiences with men. Thornton was the first person with whom she had positive relations and, because of her religious values, she felt that he should be the man she married.
Unfortunately, she said, they did not have much of anything else in common and she found herself unhappy with the relationship.
"Deep beneath the garbage is a wonderful person, he really is," she said.
Also, Williams was unaware she was suffering from Grave's Disease, which is a disorder as a result of an overactive thyroid. This caused tumors, some of which were the size of apples, growing on her gland. She was burned out and had her weight fluctuated from time to time. So with the emotional pain of the relationship and the disorder, she felt like death was an alternative relief, she said.
But Thornton recognized her unhappiness and decided to "let her go." Williams said that she did not have the inner strength at the time to make the decision to leave him, and would have stayed in the relationship had he not suggested the divorce.
When Do We Eat"We get what we need to learn," - Williams
Having many bad experiences in her professional career, Williams was easily able to appreciate the times when she worked with nice, professional, talented people. Director Darin Scott was one of the few directors who made her feel comfortable on the set. According to Williams, he was well organized, creative and completely respectful to her.
To top it off he had Craft Services, a catering company used for the filming of projects, provide food for the actors.
"Food is such an important part of the process," she said.
She explained she had been on sets where they were filming hours upon hours, and all the production really offered was M&Ms and other junk foods. Actors really need to be well-nourished during intense shoots.
"It keeps the set moving," she said.
Some other projects she enjoyed working on were the "Talented Tenth," a play based on W.E.B. Dubois' ideology; "When Do We Eat," a movie directed by Salvador Litvak and "Caught Up," which co-starred Bokeem Woodbine.
Working with Halle Berry was also a treat.
"She is a sweet girl," she said. "I really feel like she is my younger sister."
She did say that Berry has way more potential than she puts out there and she wishes she would pull from her pain to really get into the psyches of certain characters.
Twilight: Cynda Williams, 2006"I can change for you,"- Williams
Williams has used her grief to bring many of her characters to life. She explained when one does not have time to prepare for roles, sometimes that is all one can really do. In "Twilight: Los Angeles, 1992" Williams played the title character of Twilight Bay, an ex-gang leader who was an essential part of squashing gang violence. The purpose of the character was to bring hope to a tumultuous experience. The show paralleled Williams' life because she had been through many "tests" while in a career that most people view as a fairy-tale. She recently talked to high school students about her trials.
"I saw so much hope in their eyes," she said. "I want people to realize that if they persist in the battle of life, they can survive."
Williams has brought hope to her fellow cast members including junior musical theater and dance major, Chadae' McAlister.
"It's been really inspiring," McAlister said. "She being the only person of color [for part of the time she was a student at Ball State] really had to push her way through ... She really makes me feel capable."
According to Twilight Bay, William's character, twilight is a place between darkness and light, a place that he likes to call "Limbo." In Roman Catholic theology, "Limbo" is the temporary status of righteous souls who died but did not go to heaven yet. Perhaps that is where Williams is, looking toward the light but still trying to overcome the darkness that had cast shadows over much of her life.
Williams drew a parallel between Rodney King and her life. It is up to the individuals to make changes for the better.
"Life can beat your ass," she said. "But I take responsibility. I claim 'victor-hood.' I don't want to be a victim."
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