It might be weird of me to relate homesickness to spirituality, and even weirder that I compare all of that to nature, but in this particular case it's okay.-á
High school is like living in a giant bubble. Everything that one would ever desire is at your fingertips and "senior year can't get any better!"
My senior year was consumed with college applications, comforting my devastated parents as they geared up to send their last remaining child to college. I worked during football games and was fine with that. I had more fun auditioning all over the country than going to prom.
To say the least, I was ready to move on. I will be the poster child for a second and say that Ball State embraced me with open arms. The campus sparkled and the people were as eager to see me as I was to be away from home.
It wasn't until week number three when I started to melt. My orderly life, laid perfectly in front of me, was demolished and reality waved "hello" at my crumbling existence. Everything that I had control over - great grades, a thousand friends, fantastic boyfriend, lead roles in every play, captain of the tennis team - spun out and my neat life had officially fallen apart.
I needed my mom. I needed security, assurance, a fairy godmother with fantastic taste, something! Bottom line, I was homesick.
That's right, Miss Independent wanted to spoon and to have someone call her "Pretty."-á
I'm 19, and this is my second year away from home. No, I'm not a homesickness specialist Ph. D psychologist, but I will gladly speak from experience. I wish someone had said this to me when I was a freshman and missing home.
For the record, it's normal.
It's perfectly fine to have a pang for your old room, equipped with comfy bed, own bathroom and decently sized closet. The real challenge is being able to cope from the absence of these childhood necessities. -á
Call me crazy, but I believe I am the only one to notice to massive amount of monarch butterflies that flood this campus.
I am privileged to walk to Ball Gym everyday, passing the chameleon trees, as they are slowly beginning to change colors, and see these insects almost everywhere I look.
I believe that these butterflies represent the presence of those people and comfortable fixations we leave at home every summer.
A story came to my attention recently, regarding a specific butterfly, but this one was in Michigan. A couple was wed this summer, with the expectations of their familiar pastor to perform the ceremony. Due to a bad rainstorm and a stroke of very bad luck, the pastor passed away days before the wedding. When the associate pastor stepped in, he mentioned how their dear friend was with them in spirit, and at that moment a monarch butterfly flew into the sanctuary and fluttered around his head.
I suppose coincidence could be in play with this story, but it's much more comforting to believe that the presence of another was near on that particular afternoon.-á
When we feel the most lost, in this personal growth time period, we must continue to look for the light. Being in touch with yourself is the greatest advice I have ever received, and understanding that it's okay to grieve and take as much time as needed to cope, to change, to adjust.-á
In the meantime, continue to look for the butterflies.
Chelsea Picken is a sophomore musical theater major and writes 'A Shot in the Dark' for the Daily News. Her views do not necessarily agree with those of the newspaper.
Write to Chelsea at cppicken@bsu.edu.