C 2.0 GPA
Time for Lesson One in Professor David Swindle's Film Appreciation 101 course.
Today's Question: How do you tell if the film you're about to watch will be great?
Let us consider various comic book and superhero films.
Exhibit A: "Batman Begins," directed by Christopher Nolan, who made "Memento."
"X-men" and "X-men 2," directed by Bryan Singer, who made "The Usual Suspects."
"Sin City" directed by Robert Rodriguez, who made "Desperado" and "From Dusk Till Dawn."
"Spiderman" and "Spiderman 2," directed by Sam Raimi, who made "The Evil Dead" trilogy.
"Ghost World," directed by Terry Zwigoff, who made "Crumb," one of the greatest documentaries ever filmed.
"Batman" and "Batman Returns," directed by Tim Burton, who has put out plenty of original, fantastic films.
Exhibit B: "Daredevil," directed by Mark Steven Johnson, who made "Simon Birch" and wrote "Jack Frost" and "Big Bully."
"Elektra," directed by Rob Bowman, who made "Reign of Fire."
"The Punisher," directed by Jonathan Hensleigh, who wrote the screenplay for "Armageddon."
"Batman and Robin," directed by Joel Schumacher, who made "8mm."
The point, my students? Directors who can dance in the spring of greatness generally stay there, continually performing blissful ballets film after film. Those who squat in the toilet of mediocrity churn out just what you'd expect: pure crap.
The exception is, of course, "The Hulk," directed by Ang Lee, who made "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." But everyone is allowed to have at least one cinematic bowel movement.
So let's apply this exercise to the film at hand, "Fantastic Four," from director Tim Story, whose previous film was "Taxi," the 2004 action/comedy starring Jimmy Fallon and Queen Latifah. Now, in which category does "Fantastic Four" probably belong?
Don't forget to flush on your way out.
Honestly, though, "crap" is a bit strong for "Fantastic Four." It's really not that bad. It has its fun moments, its entertainments, its nice sights. It just does not have the depth, the strong characters, the engaging storyline of the Exhibit A films.
The story is basic comic book stuff: Reed Richards, Ben Grimm, Susan Storm and her brother Johnny are bombarded in space with cosmic rays that give them bizarre powers. Reed becomes the rubber-man Mr. Fantastic; Ben turns into the super-strong, orange stone creature known as The Thing; Susan becomes the light-bending Invisible Woman; and "hot-headed" Johnny becomes the fiery Human Torch. Also aboard the space station and bombarded as well is their financier and future nemesis Victor Von Doom, who eventually begins to go insane, turnining into metal and firing energy beams.
To Story's credit, he did not exactly have the most engaging material with which to work. The Fantastic Four are just not very fascinating characters. The X-Men, Batman and Spider-Man are all characters that struggle on a human level. They're often-persecuted outsiders. The Fantastic Four, on the other hand, become accepted celebrities almost from the start. Even the Thing is beloved.
Story also does not have the kind of A-list actors that other comic book films possessed. The only recognizable actress is Jessica Alba as the Invisible Woman -- and when she's the best you've got, you're in trouble. Even in "Sin City," my favorite film of the year, she was the weak link. Here, that honor goes to Ioan Gruffudd as Mr. Fantastic.
So to conclude today's lesson: if you have not paid attention to that director credit, now is the time to start. It will do wonders to help improve the quality of the films you see. Class dismissed.
Read More
Three Air Jam teams take home the win
October 12, 2012Nineteen teams shimmied, shook and flipped for a sold out John R. Emens Auditorium on Thursday night during the 25th annual Air Jam.
Bill Clinton Speaks at North Central High School
October 12, 2012Former President's Speech Could Have Effect on State Senate Race
