With Muncie soon to be blanketed under mounds of unswept snow, I know that it is time for me to face one of the worst chores a woman has to confront.
I once again must begin my hunt for that ever-elusive pair of blue jeans. There seems to be a myth that all girls love to shop. Of course there is some truth in this belief, many of my friends view shopping as a religious experience, but if you've ever met me, or even seen me, you probably have discovered that I do not favor this task in the least.
In fact I hate shopping; the lines, the competition, the crazed soccer moms with their identical haircuts and matching mini vans drive me to the brink.
Malls are about as interesting as a dentist's office and almost as uncomfortable. My friends can't really understand my outright loathing of their favorite pasttime, but even they must admit that looking for pants -- blue jeans particularly -- is trying to even the most ardent of shopacholics.
It's almost impossible to survive these days without a decent pair of jeans; they're the uniform of our generation. They can be the most soothing thing in a person's closet, that is if you can actually find a pair that fits.
I don't think guys understand how easy they have it when it comes to clothing, especially pants. They can usually walk into a store find their waist size and inseam and buy a pair without even trying them on. I don't think I've ever met a woman that can do the same with a clear conscience.
I always start to feel a little like Indiana Jones as I search through the racks looking for that obscure treasure. I've come to terms with the fact that I most likely will never be able to find my perfect fitting pair of blue jeans. I come from a long line of short squat little women who make Cotton Hill seem like a giant.
I always find it ironic that I have to scour the petite area for my clothing when the very essence of the section's title makes me envision waifish girls with willowy limbs. I'm about as petite as a truck driver however, I know I'm not the only lady out there combatting the forces of my genetics against the strangeness of the fashion industry.
I often wonder what the designers can be thinking when they decide to create some of these "masterpieces" of theirs. They seem to assume that if you're 5'1" and not a size one that you obviously gain all your weight in your stomach. So they've come up with these awful elastic-wasted stretch jeans to fill our clothing void.
It doesn't get any better for the tall or medium girls either. You'd think that in this day of PDAs and PCs somebody would be able to come up with a way to make a pair of blue jeans that could fit you in the waist and the hips.
I mean isn't there a way to stick a dart in or a pleat? You fashion majors should make this your mission. If someone were able to actually crack this code they'd be a billionaire in a blink.
Write to Jessie at jerenslow@bsu.edu
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