Although the Supreme Court struck down portions of the Defense of Marriage Act and the federal government now recognizes federal marriage benefits, same-sex couples are finding there are two sides to marriage equality — the freedom to marry and the freedom to divorce.
Ivy Tech sophomore 27-year-old Christine Cimino is caught in marriage limbo after her wife said she wants a divorce.
The couple tied the knot on May 5 after three-months of dating. Indiana does not recognize same-sex marriage, so the pair traveled to Iowa, where it is legal, to say their vows.
A few months later, Cimino was thrown out of the apartment the two shared, and her wife changed the locks.
“It was perfect chemistry at time,” Cimino said. “[She said], ‘If I asked you to marry me, what would you say?’ And I [said] ‘Yes, because it feels right.’ A couple of weeks later, it started to unfold.”
Without Indiana’s recognition of gay marriage, Cimino and her wife cannot get a divorce because, to the state of Indiana, their marriage does not exist.
In order to get a divorce in Iowa, they would have to move back to the state for reasons other than divorce and meet a residency requirement of one year.
Christopher Clark, Chicago senior staff attorney for Lambda Legal, a legal institution for the advancement of civil rights for the LGBT community, said as more states grant same-sex couples marriage rights, the disparity between marriage and divorce rights between states will create a split society.
“It’s a problem we’ve seen since the states started recognizing freedom to marry for same-sex couples, because people don’t stay in one place for the rest of their lives,” Clark said. “It’s a stark example of why it’s necessary for states to extend the freedom to marry to same-sex couples. It needs to happen everywhere.”
One option for same-sex couples that are unable to obtain divorce is to move to meet the residency requirement in a state that would recognize their marriage, Clark said.
He has also seen cases where courts in a state that does not recognize same-sex marriage, like Indiana, may grant a judicial order to release the parties from the legal obligations of their marriage, without granting a technical “divorce.”
Clark said the main legal problem same-sex couples unable to obtain a divorce may face is the inability to enter into another marriage and move on with their lives.
“This creates a situation for couples that are not able to obtain divorces to move on with their lives and develop relationships and perhaps have families with other people,” he said. “It creates real world problems for people who are trying to structure their lives and achieve what they want.”
Another situation similar to Cimino’s is currently moving through the Indiana court system.
According to the Associated Press, Donald Schultz Lee was married in Massachusetts and lives in Indiana with his husband. He filed for divorce in Marion County, Ind., and is waiting to see whether or not the judge will grant him a divorce.
The future in Indiana is uncertain for cases like Schultz Lee and Cimino.
After the DOMA ruling, Governor Mike Pence expressed his support for a measure to write Indiana’s gay marriage ban into the state constitution.
“I believe marriage is the union between a man and a woman and is a unique institution worth defending in our state and nation,” Pence said in a statement. “While I am disappointed that the Supreme Court has overturned the federal Defense of Marriage Act, I am grateful that today’s decisions respect the sovereignty of states on this important issue. These decisions preserve the duty and obligation of the states to define and administer marriage as they see fit.”
If the measure passes in the state legislature next year, Indiana voters would see it on the ballot in 2014.
Cimino has since moved in with her parents in Virginia to have a place to stay. She will continue taking Ivy Tech classes online, but has no plans to move back to Indiana.
For now, she is in contact with multiple lawyers to find a solution and move on with her life.
“Gay people fight so hard for marriage and she made a mockery of marriage,” Cimino said. “It creates a problem now because gay divorce is even worse than gay marriage.”
