Flip up your collars and French-roll your jeans. Grab the banana clips for the side ponytail that hurt so horribly but looked so tubular. The 80s are back.
Maybe it's not with a vengeance. Maybe this time it isn't personal, but it seems the spirit of the 80s is regenerating at full force.
The clothing can be tolerated, but remaking a perfectly legitimate 80s chick flick is just plain wrong. I came to this realization when I saw a commercial for "Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights."
It looks the same as the first, but lacks Jennifer Grey pre-rhinoplasty and Patrick Swayze in tight pants. Any self-respecting 80s fan would think, "How good can that be?"
The 80s had some of the best motion pictures. John Hughes directed some classic teen comedies starring great thespians like Emilio Estevez and Molly Ringwald. Films of the 80s provided the sad and yet hilarious truths of teen angst, along with a large dose of scrawny, nerdy, guys that ended up becoming heartthrobs. Anthony Edwards, John Cusack and Patrick Dempsey come to mind.
I still watch "The Breakfast Club" on the Superstation, even though I can quote the movie. (Yes, even the edited versions.)
So basically remaking a classic, taking it away from charming Kellerman's Resort and placing it in Cuba is going to make that movie worthwhile?
Absolutely not, even with a student discount at the local movie theater.
It seems like a ploy to sell Revlon cosmetics and make the Hillary Duff fans get into something outside of Disney.
The original "Dirty Dancing" addressed class issues, abortion and premarital sex.
It makes me wonder what kind of traitor would take a movie with so many social messages and make it to re-live what was a hit.
The re-make is an insult to those who have respect for "Footloose," "Sixteen Candles," and "Say Anything."
Therefore, this is a vicious cycle that must be stopped.
On behalf of anyone who has ever watched an 80s movie more than three times in one weekend just because it was on, I am appalled. Please, someone, re-release "Weird Science" into theaters, give me a discount on a "Teen Wolf" DVD. Throw in "Teen Wolf Two" if absolutely necessary. Just stop trying to make good movies over again.
As films like this trickle to the theaters, join me in protest. Rent stacks of 80s movies from "Adventures in Babysitting" to "War Games." Reward yourself and skip "Xanadu." Everyone can benefit from revisiting one of the best decades in cinematography.
American teenagers need our help. They must be protected from horrible remakes and exposed to what really matters, even if the only copies we can find are on Beta.
Those who can't find the time to watch these films could at least carry around a boom box for sake of the cause.
Write to Lauren at lauren_phillips@lycos.com
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