BORN IN A BALL JAR: Use resources to reduce stress when overwhelmed

<p><strong>Pam Huffer</strong> takes a rest after spending the morning moving into her new home in Muncie in January 2014 after her husband died in September 2013. Huffer passed away Oct. 9, leaving her two daughters Emily and Jordan. <em>DN FILE PHOTO JORDAN HUFFER</em></p>

Pam Huffer takes a rest after spending the morning moving into her new home in Muncie in January 2014 after her husband died in September 2013. Huffer passed away Oct. 9, leaving her two daughters Emily and Jordan. DN FILE PHOTO JORDAN HUFFER

Jordan Huffer is a senior photojournalism major and writes ‘Born in a Ball Jar’ for The Daily News. Her views do not necessarily agree with those of the newspaper or The Daily. Write to Jordan at jahuffer@bsu.edu.

As of 8:50 p.m. on Oct. 9, I was an orphan.

I know that I'm not an orphan in the sense that Little Orphan Annie or Oliver Twist are. But I am an orphan because both of my parents are dead. My father passed away last September, and then my mother at the aforementioned date and time.

I took a week and a half off. I kept telling myself, "Just don't get overwhelmed, and you'll be fine."

So I, naturally, became instantly overwhelmed.

I was two weeks behind on assignments and being assigned new ones from the time I missed. I was going back to work with The Daily News, Photo Services and even starting a new job doing freelance work for a local newspaper.

Add this to the normal tasks after the death of someone (lawyers, realtors and dividing of the china). And then cover that in the fact that I'm now a parentless child at the ripe old age of 26.

I guess when you put it like that, how can I not get overwhelmed?

I felt like I needed a month or a year before I could be ready to take care of this stuff, before I'd be ready to be back to normal. I accept that this isn't possible. And short of dropping out for the semester, there really isn't much of a choice.

Or so I thought.

It was a close teacher who recommend the option of taking an incomplete in a class to give myself some time to not worry about my education.

Ball State defines an incomplete grade, or an "I," as, "Incomplete work ... given only when it is determined that the student should be given an opportunity to finish the work."

So it's not dropping a class, and not failing it, but just an option for a student to complete a class beyond the semester timeframe. The instructor has to give the grade, and it is up to their discretion when a student is able to get it.

After speaking with one of my instructors, both he and I agreed that this would be a good option for me. I can work on my other classes (which I can't take a break in) and have time to deal with the meetings with lawyers and moving my mother's things.

More importantly, not having to worry about this class gives me time to get better. After the death of my father, I took it easy for a semester or so to let myself heal and get better. This time, because of a looming graduation date and an upcoming internship, I don't have that luxury.

So this "I" is really what I need.

I will be making up the remainder of the class during Winter Break, having three weeks to focus on the assignments needed to turn the "I" into an "A" (Or a "C." Either way.).

In the grand scheme of things, this may not seem like a big deal, but when you're so overwhelmed that you want to sleep all the time and building a website seems about as impossible as scaling a mountain, any little bit helps.

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