A mother of three and her domestic partner were denied a family membership at a local YMCA after having been told by three managers they were eligible.
Anginette Dearing, a student at Ivy Tech on the Ball State connect program, and Betty Hancock, a therapist, have been together for three years and now live together. The two raise Dearing's three children from her former marriage.
"They told us that they can't honor our membership because of the same-sex relationship," Dearing said.
According to a program guide issued by the Northwest YMCA at 3500 Chadam Lane, a family is defined as "the primary member and spouse plus all tax dependent children age 23 and under." Because Indiana laws do not allow same-sex marriages, Dearing and Hancock do not fit in this category.
Executive Director of the Northwest YMCA Stephen Shives said the staff members who informed Dearing and Hancock last week that they could join under the family membership were not familiar with the policy.
"We are providing better training now," he said.
Shives said the YMCA uses the Indiana law to define what a family is.
Indiana law states a family or household member is "a person who is dating or has dated and or a person who is engaged or was engaged in a sexual relationship."
President and CEO of the Muncie YMCA's Martin Fink said Shives isn't correct.
"We use the IRS guidelines," Fink said.
The IRS defines a family as brothers and sisters, spouse, ancestors and lineal descendants.
"We use a simplified version," Fink said.
Officials at YMCA branches outside of Muncie said they have structured their policies to provide for families outside the tradition mold.
Diane Parker, director of public relations for Indianapolis YMCA's, said they use a two-adult-per-household policy, which includes same-sex relationships.
Chicago also uses this policy.
Julie Mulzoff, National Media Relations director of the YMCA of the USA, said "many Y's go with the two-adult policy."
"YMCA's are created by the community to serve the community," Mulzoff said. "I don't understand why Muncie does this."
YMCA officials told Dearing that she and the three children could purchase a family membership and Hancock a single.
Dearing said she wouldn't accept it.
"I was so furious," Dearing said. "I wasn't going to be affiliated with them."
However, Hancock said she decided to take the single membership because there were no other gyms nearby open at the hours she needed.
"I am disappointed they treated us this way," Hancock said. "They don't even think how that's going to affect you."
Dearing said her children, Christopher and Chloe, 8, and Emma, 4, were upset that they couldn't join because they wouldn't be able to go swimming.
Hancock said she never thought it would be a problem to join as a family.
The Muncie YMCA Web site says they practice diversity and work to install family values.
"We are very accepting of all lifestyles," Fink said.
Fink said the policy regarding families is in place to prevent people from trying to get an unfair discount. A family membership costs $90 and covers both spouses and children, while an individual membership for adults costs $60.
"People try to take advantage of the system," Fink said. "Not saying that this family is."
Fink said the family-membership policy could change to better adjust to the community.
"It's not set in stone," Fink said. "We will change with the times. We've always changed with the times."
Hancock and Dearing both said they work together to make their family work. Dearing said Hancock picks the kids up from school, attends sporting events and is a large part of the children's lives.
"They are always asking me when we are going to get married," Dearing said. "We are a family."
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