I want to thank Meghan Farr for her sound advice in the special party section of the Daily News on 9/18/02. She saved me from some sure embarrassment. I was planning on getting excessively inebriated that evening and placing a call to that beautiful sorority girl that I have a crush on. I had no idea that it might catch up with me later on. I thought everyone loved a good-natured drunkard that lacks common sense. Since my "drunk dialing" days are over, I will be forced to get absurdly intoxicated with a group of friends and make an idiot of myself in person instead of over the phone. I am sure that she will think all the more of me for having the courage to act like a fool to her face instead of on the telephone. While I am passing out praise, I also wanted to thank the Daily News for finally including a section worth reading. Of course I am referring to the recent installment of "Party Central" since Ball State's party reputation is apparently on the line. This was news to me and much more important than the usual political drivel. I mean, who really cares if the United States invades Iraq? As long as it doesn't interrupt my IV of alcohol, the whole world can go to pot (so long as they pass it around). It's not like anyone at Ball State actually cares about world news. If they did they would have gone to a school that didn't worry about its party reputation. Finally, a college newspaper has delivered on the issues that are important to its students. Enough with classes and petty political grievances. We have all gathered in this little oasis in a sea of cows and cornfields called Muncie for one common goal; to get so inebriated that we will finally forget about the meaninglessness of our commercialized, sensationalized, consumer-driven lives. Who needs alcoholics anonymous when we have partying in public? Drunken college students of the world unite!
Eric W. Grashorn